• 5 Posts
  • 64 Comments
Joined 11 months ago
Cake day: October 3rd, 2024
  • TriflingToad@sh.itjust.workstoLemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world•A shit shitpostEnglish
    21·
    10 hours ago

    DO YOU HAVE A RELA MESS AND WANT TO CLEAN LIKE THE PROS??
    Then you gotta fry this! Hi! bily mays here Introducing Zorbies! the most abzobant material I’ve ever used.
    The way it works is by using the patented x27 fiber technology. watch as it powerful sucks in action
    use it on the window, the car, even the dog.

    something something

    Buy now for half off a pack of 2
    BUT THATS NOT ALL!! Buy in the next 20nmkknutes and I’ll throw in a jumbo Zorbie free! that’s a 60 dollar value all for only sixteen nidery nine!!

    edit: close enough

    "If you got a real mess and want to clean like the pros, then you’ve got to see this! Hi, Billy Mays here with Zorbeez, the most absorbent material I’ve ever used. It has the strength and the muscle to pick up and hold over 20 ounces of liquid. Look at this! Zorbeez attracts liquid like a magnet! It doesn’t matter if it’s coffee, soda, even red wine! Watch as this powerful vacuum action pulls and cleans the stain from out of the carpet – just that quick. The secret’s in the X27 fiber technology, making Zorbeez over 27 times more absorbent than cotton! Forget towels that just drip. And, unlike sponges that smell, Zorbeez is odor-free and leaves a path of clean. Now, you could clean and dry and never leave anything behind! You’ll be amazed at just how much they absorb – and they’re machine washable. Dry your entire car, even your dog! Use any cleaner for a streak-free window. An average family uses up to two rolls of paper towels every week. That’s cash in the trash! Save money and even help save the environment. You get two jumbo Zorbeez plus three extra large for only $14.99. But call right now and I’ll send you another five Zorbeez absolutely free! That’s 10 Zorbeez for only $14.99! And as a special bonus, we’ll also include our Micromen Microfiber Duster, free. It’s great for blinds, plants, glass, and more – and attracts dust like a magnet! That’s a $60 value, all for only $14.99! And here’s the best part, we’ll send you a set of Zorbeez free, whenever you need them, for life! Just pay shipping and processing! But you gotta call now!”

    https://dougdoug.fandom.com/wiki/Zorbeez

    I want some so bad just because of that stupid dougdoug bit but the only ones in all of eBay cost like $60 with shipping and I just can’t justify that dumb of a purchase

  • TriflingToad@sh.itjust.workstoLemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world•Informative review English
    16·
    6 days ago

    tbh the worst someone will think is you’re a dumb American, which there are a lot of. They won’t single you out or care at all.

    Even if they do, it’ll just be a gossip sesh with coworkers to pass the time and nothing more

    at least that’s how it is at my grocery store job. The only things I can remember are

    • an Irish man with a funny accent
    • someone who wanted double bagged paper for some reason
    • and some lady who stole a baby bottle and when the toddler picked it up and yelled “MOMMY YOU FOROGOT THIS!! 😃” nobody said a word about
    • also someone who tried to hide an antibiotic under dog food which I accidentally uncovered when scanning the dog food. When it rung up it was $25 and I felt sooo bad