Those aren’t true mayonnaise because they got that way via convergent evolution. True mayonnaise come from the mayonnaise region of France, otherwise it’s just bubbling emulsion.

I think I read an article about that, and that was my takeaway, too

I just might fuck myself off this weekend! Depends on how distracted I get.

The mentor has become the mentos. I am proud of you son/daughter/some random kid I found. Go forth and make some swearwolves of your own.

Watch your fucking mouth. I didn’t raise a werewolf to talk that kinda shit!

Do as I say, not say as I say, fuckface

I appreciate and understand your perspective, but I want to clarify some context:

This was my dad’s mom, so my grandparents. Had they been my parents and I’d known them at the age at which they raised me, then I’d immediately know how they raised their kids. But since this was my grandmother who raised my dad, it left me wondering what kind of parents my dad had. Was my dad a non-judgmental person in spite of his parents?

And the answer was, “no.” He learned to cast aside prejudices from my grandmother’s sick right-cross. It was mostly that kind of revelation that I needed to feel my catharsis.

(Added context: my dad is dead and I never heard that story from him. He died before my grandmother did, so I never got the opportunity to ask him about what her views on race were when he was a child.)

Clouseau looking rough these days

We’re werewolves, not swearwolves

My grandparents on my dad’s side used to make jokes that were funny when I was a kid, more concerning when I got older, and especially concerning as their dementia set in and they began outright stating people’s races in the jokes. In the years since their passing, it’s made me wonder what their beliefs on racism were, even though they raised me to never judge anyone by their race and that race will usually be a factor in how people are treated in the real world but should never be a factor in my personal interactions with anyone.

But those jokes had been weighing kinda heavy on me in recent years. I know they had dementia, but was this possibly at the core of their beliefs?

I recently heard a story, unprompted, from a family member who was present when my dad was in high school or college, in the '70s, and made an off-color joke . Apparently my dad said that a car with a poorly done paint job “looked like a Mexican car.” Without missing a beat, my grandmother punched my dad in the jaw with a right hook and yelled, “WE DO NOT MAKE DEROGATORY JOKES ABOUT PEOPLE FOR THEIR RACE!” My grandmother was always known for how passive, playful, and gentle she was, especially with her kids.

Turns out grandma was not only adamant about race sensitivity, she was kinda a badass. And the jokes I thought were possibly racist were truly homophone humor about regional dialects and not about people’s nationality.

Got any advice on alternatives to Drive? I keep considering nextcloud, but people I know have said it’s a resource hog and finicky at best.

Your mom said that one. A buncha times.

- Abraham Lincoln

Piss off, ghost!

I never fucking said that. It was Mark Twain.

- Abraham Lincoln

Hence the phrase: as toothless as a pig

Everything on the internet is true

- Abraham Lincoln

It starts with sanitation issues, so no recipe book can safely recommend it. But let’s say your name is Fartographer and you really wanna try this with dishes in your parents’ dishwasher in high school; you’ll discover the following four issues:
A) Dishwasher detergent is really gritty as to scrub the dishes with jets of water. This makes the water erode thin materials like foil really quickly and easily.
B) After the initial rinse, dishwashers fill the bottom of the unit with water and then recycle that water. Any chunks of food or other materials eventually get cycled and shot out through the jets, which can further rip your foil.
C) Once your dirty dish soap water breaches the foil, your fish tastes like soap and is peppered with old washed-off food, and the cooked parts of the fish are shredded.
D) Because of everything listed above, foil pieces and fish chunks will join your dishwater and be cycled through your dishwasher. Most dishwashers aren’t built to handle large chunks and pieces of metal, so this will likely clog the sprayer arms and then the drain and you’ll have to spend days disassembling and cleaning your parents’ dishwasher.

Of course, all of the above can be avoided if you use thicker foil and more of it, but then your fish doesn’t cook all the way through. So, best if you don’t run your dishwasher salmon with your dishes, better if you don’t cook your salmon in the dishwasher.

Edit to add: this cooking method was first popularized around the time that people were putting shit into jello or mayonnaise and marshmallows on everything and then serving it at their large dinner parties. If you’re hosting 24 people and cooking a salmon fillet for each person, running the dishwasher for a cycle starts to make a lot more sense. Add in that everything needs to have some craaAAaAzy gimmick, and “surprising” everyone that you cooked salmon in the dishwasher becomes the best method.

It is, it works, it’s stupid because you can’t do your dishes at the same time so it’s all a huge waste. It’s essentially the most redneck en papillote ever.

The shootings will continue until morale the shootings improves

I’ve been doxxed by by the devil’s party favors!