I browse “All” most of the time and the Femcel Memes show up pretty regularly. It’s not like this gif though. It’s more like watching a super interesting science experiment.
“Ah, yes. I see. I see. How interesting!”
My scientific notes so far:
They crave cuddles. It’s almost like a cuddle-based economy.
Not sure that i do. Those seem to be completely pointless and I’m always baffled why people crave those so much. Under good circumstances, after practicing those become completely neutral, but usually those are just uncomfortable.
I can! I’m disgusted by other people touching me. I’m more like those shy cats that hide under the furniture if you try to pet them, and only come hang out next to you if you leave them alone
Understandable, yes! I lack that too though, I just don’t like to be touched nor touch others, and I do not desire it either. I do like to pet… or I guess more like poke and pat animals (though there’s specific conditions for what type of fur I will tolerate touching), but that’s about it. I can hug my dog but that’s about the extend of it. I also have problems with my own limbs touching each other or my torso which causes more issues honestly. “Touch starved” is something I simply don’t understand lmao
Until you wrote “I also have problems with my own limbs”, I thought your sensitivity could be due to the warmth of other human bodies which some people find hard to deal with, indeed. But if you also have a constant “pins and needles” feeling and cannot even stand your own touch, so to speak, you might want to look into your sodium levels. It changed things a very great deal for me. Well, that and seriously reducing my caffeine intake.
Oh no it’s not “pins and needles” it’s just disgust, I have hypersensitivity to touch in general and touching humans is basically just the worst of it for some reason. A bit like you’d step on dog shit or touch something rotting etc. I get the shivers and all that, it’s terrible. If I don’t get the unpleasant touch to stop quick enough, eventually I go crazy and will struggle like a rabid animal, since it’s so intolerable - I know because I’ve gotten to that point couple times by trying jeans on… I don’t know why or how my own limbs can trigger this shit as well, it’s just my stupid corpse being shitty I guess. I can’t do breathing exercises or mindfulness stuff either, because becoming even more aware of my body makes it so much worse
In my case it helped greatly to tell others that i have a fear of human touch even though that was not accurate at all but others understood easier and knew what to dont.
[the rest you can skip, i got carried away a bit]
Then at some point i actually developed a fear without noticing: fear of the touch consequences. In retrospect it was very stressful with all the mindfulness to track everyones movements and directional intentions.
After switching schools i could not avoid others anymore and did go into confrontation therapy (handshakes & hugs, mostly worked because i was the one innitiating/controlling) which got rid of the hyperventilating panic and switched it to something mostly neutral and dependent to person. But except my bf and close family i dont seek out touches activly because i still feel it.
Everyone has different preferences, straight man here and I always want cuddles. It depends on what your “love language” is i.e. how you prefer to give/receive affection.
For me cuddles and other forms of non-sexual touch (not that I’m asexual, far from it) are my preference for giving and receiving. Acts of service, like cooking a meal etc. I’m fine with giving but it makes me feel awkward to receive. And gift giving (random flowers, chocolate, trinkets, etc.) I prefer not to do because trying to come up with a good gift stresses me out and I don’t like random gifts, I really appreciate the thought but if I don’t find a use for it, including being a decoration I like, I don’t want it.
But like you said, you find a middle ground with your partner and I do the same as well.
I just took an NFPA 70E electrical safety course, and the instructor was talking about how electricians love to cuddle.
I thought it was weird for a sec, then I remembered the last time I opened an electrical panel with someone else nearby. Then I remembered every other time I opened an electrical panel with other people nearby. Then I remembered all the times that I was all the other people nearby.
Then he showed us a video of an arc flash with 3 people inside the panel, and then there was nobody nearby.
When I was very young, I had a friend with the AIM name “BovineLover” (followed by a number I don’t remember). They were how I learned the word “bovine.” I haven’t talked to them in almost thirty years.
I’m inclined to assume that you are they. Hopefully you’ve had a good thirty years!
Straight guys can’t say it. Not because they don’t crave them, they just can’t say that they do without social sanction. Everyone else apparently gets a pass though.
It takes a certain baseline amount of social privilege to be able to not give a shit what the haters say. When society writ large decides to hate you (as is implied by the term “social pariah”), then suddenly what people think of you actually matters a lot.
True, I get heavy insults from people just for being sick around them. I don’t mean transmissible sickness. Like, the moment you are sick and can’t hide it, they expect you to quit your job and go die somewhere.
Another note is that they seem to all be autistic, with many of them exhibiting symptoms of severe depression. Most are also trans lesbians. Many seem to be cat/fox/puppygirls.
Lots of lonely guys aren’t lashing out and demeaning others either, but people don’t notice them because they’re not lashing out and demeaning others. They still get labeled as incels though, and if they find that hurtful then people will absolutely shred them for it anyway.
Also, they’ll be shamed for bed rotting, and shamed for watching yuri. No matter what they do, they’ll be shamed for it. So it’s honestly not surprising when a number of them end up lashing out.
Yes, people do call even the ones who aren’t being assholes “incels.” It’s a derogatory term that gets used against anyone who doesn’t get laid. Like calling someone a “virgin.” It’s shitty, and it promotes toxic masculinity. It also objectifies women by implying that men need to “get p***y” in order to be worthy of basic respect.
And I’m tired of hearing this excuse that “it doesn’t refer to literal involuntary celibates, it refers to redpilled misogynistic jerks.” But that simply isn’t true, because people definitely apply it to literal “involuntary celibates” and use it as an insult like calling someone a “virgin.” It’s childish and immature. Also, there are lots of misogynistic jerks who get laid. Focusing all your ire on “incels” misses the point entirely, lets those people off the hook, and perpetuates the issue by communicating the subtext that “you can be a misogynistic jerk as long as you get laid, and then we’ll still respect you.” If you can’t see how that’s toxic and detrimental to society, then I can’t help you.
And do you think that women are not judged if they behave in the femcel manner?
They’re more likely to be fetishized, which is bad in a different way. But it certainly hasn’t risen to the level of a cultural pastime like shaming incels has.
It seems like you’re applying a double standard, there.
I’m not the one applying a double-standard. I’m pointing out the double-standard.
I never said “femcels should be shamed, and incels shouldn’t be.”
I said “femcels don’t get shamed the same way incels do.”
If the former is how you interpret the latter, that’s on you. If I need to explicitly state what I meant, it’s closer to this:
“Maybe nobody should be shamed for being lonely and having poor social skills, regardless of gender.”
If the issue is misogyny, target the misogyny. Not the inability to get sex, because that is going to do nothing to address the misogyny.
I’ve had to put a lot of thought into this over the years, because usually anything I say about it gets deflected into a strawman and then I just get called a redpilled incel and suddenly people assume that I’m making demands on women’s bodies, when all I’m demanding is the same baseline level of respect that literally everyone else deserves.
So I have to navigate the argument very delicately, or else people assume I meant things that I didn’t say.
From that dismissive answer, I’m going to surmise that you leap to conclusions about people and throw around “incel” as an insult because it makes you feel powerful to punch down on people with poor social skills.
Hmm yes they often are even when they are just complaining that they disdain the situation.
I don’t know about women though I don’t know that many that are bed rotting
If they can look up Yaoi, bed rot, or even have the energy to complain about men, they are underemployed. I can’t even think about sex without realizing I could probably pull it off, but my job would get in the way of it, as with anything. The workplace is our god, everything, even family is secondary, because you can’t have family without work.
I mean, you don’t have to be attracted to anything you’re not attracted to. No one is saying “you have to like puppygirls!”
The point isn’t to fetishize femcels. The point is that double-standards are a problem that maybe understandably lead to people feeling left behind by society.
Maybe “incels” have a legitimate reason for feeling discontent after all, and it’s not “because women tell them no” like people claim. More like “because people ridicule them for being alone.”
Can get a used quest 2 for like $100, not crazy but not nothing. Unfortunately not powerful enough to view the more detailed rooms or avatars, or so I’ve heard.
I think I just walked in here from searching about VR stuff, but you can 3d print a PCVR headset and assemble with off the shelf components for under $150 USD (there’s an article on hackaday), or buy used headsets for $200-300. It’s not unobtainable to most, I think.
I browse “All” most of the time and the Femcel Memes show up pretty regularly. It’s not like this gif though. It’s more like watching a super interesting science experiment.
“Ah, yes. I see. I see. How interesting!”
My scientific notes so far:
Who among us cannot say the same?
People who are touch averse.
Not sure that i do. Those seem to be completely pointless and I’m always baffled why people crave those so much. Under good circumstances, after practicing those become completely neutral, but usually those are just uncomfortable.
I can! I’m disgusted by other people touching me. I’m more like those shy cats that hide under the furniture if you try to pet them, and only come hang out next to you if you leave them alone
(and yes it’s 'tism)
You can crave cuddles and be disgusted by other human beings at the same time.
It’s called I have a person, and only that person may touch me. And the cat. The cat too.
Understandable, yes! I lack that too though, I just don’t like to be touched nor touch others, and I do not desire it either. I do like to pet… or I guess more like poke and pat animals (though there’s specific conditions for what type of fur I will tolerate touching), but that’s about it. I can hug my dog but that’s about the extend of it. I also have problems with my own limbs touching each other or my torso which causes more issues honestly. “Touch starved” is something I simply don’t understand lmao
Until you wrote “I also have problems with my own limbs”, I thought your sensitivity could be due to the warmth of other human bodies which some people find hard to deal with, indeed. But if you also have a constant “pins and needles” feeling and cannot even stand your own touch, so to speak, you might want to look into your sodium levels. It changed things a very great deal for me. Well, that and seriously reducing my caffeine intake.
Oh no it’s not “pins and needles” it’s just disgust, I have hypersensitivity to touch in general and touching humans is basically just the worst of it for some reason. A bit like you’d step on dog shit or touch something rotting etc. I get the shivers and all that, it’s terrible. If I don’t get the unpleasant touch to stop quick enough, eventually I go crazy and will struggle like a rabid animal, since it’s so intolerable - I know because I’ve gotten to that point couple times by trying jeans on… I don’t know why or how my own limbs can trigger this shit as well, it’s just my stupid corpse being shitty I guess. I can’t do breathing exercises or mindfulness stuff either, because becoming even more aware of my body makes it so much worse
In my case it helped greatly to tell others that i have a fear of human touch even though that was not accurate at all but others understood easier and knew what to dont.
[the rest you can skip, i got carried away a bit]
Then at some point i actually developed a fear without noticing: fear of the touch consequences. In retrospect it was very stressful with all the mindfulness to track everyones movements and directional intentions.
After switching schools i could not avoid others anymore and did go into confrontation therapy (handshakes & hugs, mostly worked because i was the one innitiating/controlling) which got rid of the hyperventilating panic and switched it to something mostly neutral and dependent to person. But except my bf and close family i dont seek out touches activly because i still feel it.
deleted by creator
Everyone has different preferences, straight man here and I always want cuddles. It depends on what your “love language” is i.e. how you prefer to give/receive affection.
For me cuddles and other forms of non-sexual touch (not that I’m asexual, far from it) are my preference for giving and receiving. Acts of service, like cooking a meal etc. I’m fine with giving but it makes me feel awkward to receive. And gift giving (random flowers, chocolate, trinkets, etc.) I prefer not to do because trying to come up with a good gift stresses me out and I don’t like random gifts, I really appreciate the thought but if I don’t find a use for it, including being a decoration I like, I don’t want it.
But like you said, you find a middle ground with your partner and I do the same as well.
I just took an NFPA 70E electrical safety course, and the instructor was talking about how electricians love to cuddle.
I thought it was weird for a sec, then I remembered the last time I opened an electrical panel with someone else nearby. Then I remembered every other time I opened an electrical panel with other people nearby. Then I remembered all the times that I was all the other people nearby.
Then he showed us a video of an arc flash with 3 people inside the panel, and then there was nobody nearby.
Arc flashes are nature’s way of saying cuddle time is over.
I definitely crave them.
When I was very young, I had a friend with the AIM name “BovineLover” (followed by a number I don’t remember). They were how I learned the word “bovine.” I haven’t talked to them in almost thirty years.
I’m inclined to assume that you are they. Hopefully you’ve had a good thirty years!
Well I’m not even thirty, so I’m probably not him.
Straight guys can’t say it. Not because they don’t crave them, they just can’t say that they do without social sanction. Everyone else apparently gets a pass though.
I’ll say it; I crave cuddles.
Cuddles while watching TV is one of the only things that’ll pull me away from my computer.
Brave. Now say it on a de-anonymized platform and enjoy being a social pariah for the rest of your life.
I’m absolutely baffled by this comment. What makes you think this would be an even remotely controversial thing to say?
It might have something to do with the fact that I’ve personally experienced being shamed and ridiculed for saying similar things.
People like to jump to conclusions, so “I crave cuddles” quickly becomes “I demand woman flesh” in their perception.
Pffft. Grow the fuck up, find your fucking balls and fucking own it.
It only plays that way if you let it.
Having balls doesn’t stop society from ridiculing/deriding/scorning/stigmatizing/sanctioning me. Oh, if only growing a pair was all I needed to do.
As if being rejected by society is something I have control over! It takes a sociopathic narcissist to think “people can only hate me if I let them.”
It takes the aforementioned set of minerals to cease giving a flying fuck what those that have negative comment for showing your feelings have to say.
Society at large doesn’t ridicule for that, merely certain toxic subsets that should be rightfully shunned into nonexistence.
Become the change you want to see.
It takes a certain baseline amount of social privilege to be able to not give a shit what the haters say. When society writ large decides to hate you (as is implied by the term “social pariah”), then suddenly what people think of you actually matters a lot.
True, I get heavy insults from people just for being sick around them. I don’t mean transmissible sickness. Like, the moment you are sick and can’t hide it, they expect you to quit your job and go die somewhere.
Same thing applies with mental illness, including depression.
Another note is that they seem to all be autistic, with many of them exhibiting symptoms of severe depression. Most are also trans lesbians. Many seem to be cat/fox/puppygirls.
Conclusion: headpats are in order
https://youtu.be/vI9GUrnmshE
“Aw cute puppygirls!” head pats
“Ew gross incels, yuck!” social stigma
The difference being that the puppygirls aren’t lashing out and demeaning others … they’re just bed rotting while watching yaoi
Lots of lonely guys aren’t lashing out and demeaning others either, but people don’t notice them because they’re not lashing out and demeaning others. They still get labeled as incels though, and if they find that hurtful then people will absolutely shred them for it anyway.
Also, they’ll be shamed for bed rotting, and shamed for watching yuri. No matter what they do, they’ll be shamed for it. So it’s honestly not surprising when a number of them end up lashing out.
Are people calling those who don’t behave like assholes “incel” though?
And do you think that women are not judged if they behave in the femcel manner?
It seems like you’re applying a double standard, there.
Yes, people do call even the ones who aren’t being assholes “incels.” It’s a derogatory term that gets used against anyone who doesn’t get laid. Like calling someone a “virgin.” It’s shitty, and it promotes toxic masculinity. It also objectifies women by implying that men need to “get p***y” in order to be worthy of basic respect.
And I’m tired of hearing this excuse that “it doesn’t refer to literal involuntary celibates, it refers to redpilled misogynistic jerks.” But that simply isn’t true, because people definitely apply it to literal “involuntary celibates” and use it as an insult like calling someone a “virgin.” It’s childish and immature. Also, there are lots of misogynistic jerks who get laid. Focusing all your ire on “incels” misses the point entirely, lets those people off the hook, and perpetuates the issue by communicating the subtext that “you can be a misogynistic jerk as long as you get laid, and then we’ll still respect you.” If you can’t see how that’s toxic and detrimental to society, then I can’t help you.
They’re more likely to be fetishized, which is bad in a different way. But it certainly hasn’t risen to the level of a cultural pastime like shaming incels has.
I’m not the one applying a double-standard. I’m pointing out the double-standard.
I never said “femcels should be shamed, and incels shouldn’t be.”
I said “femcels don’t get shamed the same way incels do.”
If the former is how you interpret the latter, that’s on you. If I need to explicitly state what I meant, it’s closer to this:
“Maybe nobody should be shamed for being lonely and having poor social skills, regardless of gender.”
If the issue is misogyny, target the misogyny. Not the inability to get sex, because that is going to do nothing to address the misogyny.
All well said and more articulate than I could pull off, bravo.
I’ve had to put a lot of thought into this over the years, because usually anything I say about it gets deflected into a strawman and then I just get called a redpilled incel and suddenly people assume that I’m making demands on women’s bodies, when all I’m demanding is the same baseline level of respect that literally everyone else deserves.
So I have to navigate the argument very delicately, or else people assume I meant things that I didn’t say.
From that wall of text, I’m going to surmise that “incel” has been used as a pejorative towards you, with a reason that you’re blind to
From that dismissive answer, I’m going to surmise that you leap to conclusions about people and throw around “incel” as an insult because it makes you feel powerful to punch down on people with poor social skills.
Hmm yes they often are even when they are just complaining that they disdain the situation. I don’t know about women though I don’t know that many that are bed rotting
If they can look up Yaoi, bed rot, or even have the energy to complain about men, they are underemployed. I can’t even think about sex without realizing I could probably pull it off, but my job would get in the way of it, as with anything. The workplace is our god, everything, even family is secondary, because you can’t have family without work.
Anyone who has more free time than they spend sleeping is “underemployed” in your opinion?
You sound like a severely sick and twisted individual.
I feel sorry for your family, if you have one.
The fact they’re mostly trans take the appeal from me.
I mean, you don’t have to be attracted to anything you’re not attracted to. No one is saying “you have to like puppygirls!”
The point isn’t to fetishize femcels. The point is that double-standards are a problem that maybe understandably lead to people feeling left behind by society.
Maybe “incels” have a legitimate reason for feeling discontent after all, and it’s not “because women tell them no” like people claim. More like “because people ridicule them for being alone.”
They’ll be nice if you give them a pink monster and tell them they’re a good girl.
Please tell me you’re talking about an energy drink.
I prefer white monster but yes
just wait till you see the cuddle parties in vrchat with full body tracking hehe
(I’m the one with piece signs)
though, unfortunately not with the folks from femcel memes… :(
^cough cough !VRChat@sh.itjust.works cough cough^
Strange as fuck heh. Also, it’s a rich person solution as well.
Can get a used quest 2 for like $100, not crazy but not nothing. Unfortunately not powerful enough to view the more detailed rooms or avatars, or so I’ve heard.
I think I just walked in here from searching about VR stuff, but you can 3d print a PCVR headset and assemble with off the shelf components for under $150 USD (there’s an article on hackaday), or buy used headsets for $200-300. It’s not unobtainable to most, I think.
That would literally fuck up my life rn actually. Believe it or not.